Will You Be Mine, ME?


By: Cara Kalnow

Valentine’s Day is a holiday of passion (no, I’m not talking about bedroom activities here!) – so many people have heated opinions of this day. I just talked to my favorite barista at Sawada who is in the gitty stage of a new relationship and she just straight up dissed Valentine’s Day, saying it’s a silly little holiday. 

Well this silly little holiday has a strong connection to my deep beliefs about the universe, meaning of life, and my spiritual practice that brings me back to the mat each day – and it all starts with my Grandfather’s funeral.  

My Grandfather, Vernon, was born on Valentine’s day. He was a true romantic, a loving husband and father. And, a handsomely dapper man I might add. He passed away over the summer. The day of the funeral I went for a walk outside of the temple with my aunt. When we strolled back to the temple, we stopped by my aunt’s car in the parking lot. She started crying as she bent down to pick up something and said “this is a sign from my dad.” 

When she stood up she showed me one of those pink pastel candy hearts that you get in a pack that said “Hugs.” But it wasn’t just any candy heart, it was a giant size one – almost the size of my palm – and on the ground in the middle of August.  

I remember being floored. I had literally just turned in my Master’s dissertation where I wrote a theory grounded in the premise that death means annihilation (philosophy metaphysics stuff, don’t worry about it).  So the idea that my Grandfather, who just passed days earlier was sending my aunt a message was simply something this analytical 25-year-old brain couldn’t comprehend. But yet at the same time, I couldn’t shake the events.  Why was there a candy heart that people really only give out in February on the ground in the middle of August? And why was it on the driver’s side of my aunt’s car? That candied “Hugs” heart was the turning point of my belief system.

I now believe in the concept of spirit; that we are all souls who live multiple lives. Over time I’ve come to believe that each human life is created for our soul to learn a new lesson about love. We create contracts with other souls who serve a specific purpose in our life that will guide us toward the lesson of love we set out to learn. But to truly “graduate” from being an expert in whatever lesson of love we are here to learn in this lifetime, we must first learn to love ourselves.  

So this Valentine’s day, I invite you to be your own Valentine. Practice true self-love. You are so worthy of it. Focus on loving who you are right now. Release any thoughts about who you want to be and embrace your present self, loving yourself unconditionally.

Self-love is a foundational element to manifesting. In order to lay out intentions of what you wish to receive from the universe, you must first be in balance with yourself and the universe. Only then can you call in the energy that serves your highest self.

If you’re looking for guidance on cultivating self-love and inviting healthy love into your life, come join the manifesting healthy love workshop on February 15. Let it be your gift to yourself this Valentine’s Day.


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